The Guest Stars of
"Do The Handicapped Go To Hell?"

by Wild Willie Westwood



Sister Ann, Papal Secretary, The Pope
Boy in CCDGirl in CCD
Boy and Girl

Sister Anne is the catechism teacher at South Park Church and belongs to the sisters of the Bleeding Eyes of Jesus. She finds herself at a loss when the kids ask if Timmy would go to hell for not being able to confess his sins. She asks the kids to ask Priest Maxi, but his answer doesn't seem satisfactory. She calls the pope, but talks to the papal secretary first. It is at this point that one learns for sure that South Park Church is a Catholic church. Sister Anne does get to talk to the pope, but he just babbles without really hearing what she's asking him. The boy and girl are just there to take the CCD class.


Cantor, Mrs. Donovan

The cantor doesn't do much except announce Mr. Mackey's reading (Psalm 46). Mrs. Donovan is the woman found in the confessional with her ass up against the partition. Priest Maxi is on the other side of the partition having sex with Mrs. Donovan. Cartman sees all this, seeing Mrs. Donovan first, then Priest Maxi. Mrs. Donovan flies out of the confessional giggling, then Priest Maxi exits trying to save face by calling her a temptress. Cartman decides that if this priest who's supposed to guide the town to salvation can fall to sin like this, then no one can save the town, unless the kids do it. So Cartman goes on a preaching binge.

Chris, Satan's Lover

Satan, having killed Saddam in South Park: Longer, Bigger, & Uncut, looks for a new lover, and finds one in Chris, a vegetarian nutritionist before he died. Chris is so understanding that he doesn't let Saddam's return bother him. Satan sees this as smugness, as such an understanding person doesn't try to fight for the person he loves. Chris would have love fight for him, but Satan wants someone who will fight for love. Satan loves Chris, but he still has feelings for Saddam, and goes off to spend one more night with him. In the followng episode, Chris learns that understanding is not enough: he fights for Satan. This ends up forcing Satan's hand, as Satan realizes that Chris and Saddam fighting over him isn't getting the situation anywhere.