The Guest Stars of
"Holiday Special"

by Wild Willie Westwood

DNAandMe commercial and doctor

Woman 1, Cyclist, Driver, Painter

Steve, Office Worker, Jogger, Doctor

The first seven people in this group appear in the DNAandMe commercial, each mentioning their genetic makeup, and some how much percentage victim they are. The doctor appears after Randy contacts the company to get his DNA tested. The doctor tests Randy's DNA, but finds an irregularity in it, so he asks Randy to submit his DNA again, this time from his anus. He tells Randy the results of the DNA test, and Randy latches on to a minority no one expects - Neanderthal.

People in the crowd listening to Randy

Dave, Kurt

Dave wonders if Randy knows what indigenous means. Kurt wonders who let Randy talk to the school council. There is a second woman who tells him to shup up and leave the podium, but she's not visible.


Field Reporter, Peter and Mrs. Galtman, Native American

The reporter talks to Randy about his defecating on the statue in Columbus Circle in New York. Mr. Galtman is head of the school calendat committee. The boys pretend to be hitmen on the phone and threaten to take Galtman down when Randy is exposed for the hypocrite he is. Mrs. Galtman just works on her scarf and echoes "fake news" after Peter says it. The Native American (revealed in the Live Tweet as Bill Yellowhawk) falls for Randy after Randy kisses him full in the mouth, but later accepts that the feeling isn't mutual, and tells Randy to stop running for himself and just feel.