The Guest Stars of
"Crack Baby Athletic Association"

by Wild Willie Westwood

Waiter, Betsy MacIntosh, Marty and Postman

At Denny's, a waiter has a table ready for Cartman and friends. Cartman and Butters visit Betsy MacIntosh to get her crack baby to be part of their organization as soon as it's born. Marty tells the boys that Slash is nowhere, and everywhere, but the other postman comes in to tell Marty that it's up to the parents to tell their kids at the right time that Slash isn't real.

Sarah McLachlanm, Ms. Williams, Dean Howland, Mr. Peters

Sarah McLachlanm switches from abused pets to crack babies to make the same kind of commercial, which is pretty depressing to look at. Ms. Williams is a nurse that works with crack babies. At the end of the episode, she's working in a brand-new orphanage for the crack babies. Dean Howard has no idea what Cartman is talking about, and eventually kicks him out of his office. Mr. Peters is the head of EA Sports, and he's managed to gain all rights to Crack Baby Basketball and leave the kids with no money.