The Guest Stars of

by Wild Willie Westwood

Thirty rednecks

An obese woman, Two El Pollo Loco Fans

All these rednecks have at least one line, usually concerning the story arcs the boys create for their wrestling matches. Professional wrestling is indeed soap opera for men. Rednecks 5 and 13 have the most lines, so they might be worth keeping an eye on. One of these rednecks is an obese woman, seen at the Pepsi Center cheering for Edge. The two El Pollo Loco Fans say the usual "they killed Kenny" lines (for El Pollo Loco, not for Kenny) when El Pollo Loco is pulled up into the air by the RPG and blows up with it.

John Cena, Edge, Coach Connors, Vince McMahon and Assistant

The boys attend a WWE RAW event at Pepsi Center in Denver. The match we see is a mixed-partners tag team match.with the male wrestlers being John Cena and Edge. Coach Connors tries to teach traditional wrestling to the boys, but they find it rather gay, considering all the grunts and close contact. The coach tries to convince the boys, the town, and Principal Victoria about the legitimacy of traditional wrestling, but loses. Principal Victoria fires Connors for teaching a sport which contains a lot of adult issues, but when he sees the newspaper he sees that the wrestling she's firing him over is not the one he's teaching. She then tells him the other reason he's being fired is all the "gay porn" (actually Greco-Roman wrestling) the school district found on his iPhone. After Vince McMahon learns of the boys' Wrestling Takedown Federation Connors decides to attend the Smackdown show on Saturday and kill McMahon, the boys, and all the fans for taking away his job. Instead, McMahon attends the show and sees his performance, comes into the ring, and offers him main-act status on WWE. Connors accepts and walks away with Vince.

Tryouts #17, #24, and #37

There were seven people in the ring during rehearsals - three men, four boys. Cartman calls on the three men to do a bit of acting, then call on them again to share a bit of info about themselves. Number 17 is asked to react to a terrorst attack on his own family. Number 24 is asked to be a man in love with Mackenzie Phillips and reacting to news of her sleeping with her own father. Number 37 shares his love of wrestling, then breaks into song after sharing how his father's death influenced his wrestling dream.