The Guest Stars of

by Wild Willie Westwood

The Real Characters

The Pentagon

General, Tom the Specialist

The general and specialist receive the terrorists' tape and discuss it with other members of the Pentagon. The Pentagon has run out of ideas and taps Hollywood for new ideas, as it often does in times of war for propaganda, but they don't like what they hear, except for Mel Gibson. They do as he suggests and find Stan and Kyle, who are whisked away to Washington D.C.

The Directors

M. Night Shyalaman, Michael Bay

M. Night Shyalaman tries to pitch plot twists at the General and his personnel, but the General dismisses him because those aren't idea. Michael Bay tries to pitch special effects, but again the General dismisses him for lack of ideas. Mel Gibson comes in and suggests a background check for all the characters found in the terrorists' videotape. Mel Gibson appears as he does in "The Passion of The Jew," so he's not picturred here.


Judge, Driver

The judge hears Cartman's case and decides in favor of him - Kyle has to suck Cartman's balls within 24 hours or get arrested for contempt of court. Still, she's shocked at Cartman's case. After the Pentagon whisks Stan and Kyle away, Cartman follows in a gas tanker. The driver picks him up since it's not good for a kid to be on a highway alone.

Real Characters

Operator, Kurt Russell and soldiers

Paramedic, Secretary, Guard, Elderly woman

Lead Tech, Technicians 2, 4

Most of these characters just have a line or two. The elderly woman asked Cartman if anything was wrong after Cartman woke up from a nightmare. The secretary keeps her lips sealed very well, but Tom ruins it all when he talks to Cartman. The operator checks for a connection to the imagination as the portal revs up. The guard comes around to tell everyone to head for the main hall, as the Pentagon's portal had become extremely active. The paramedic tries to bring an unconscious Kyle back around, but it doesn't work. Cartman's persistence saves the day. Kurt Russell was called in to help the soldiers go through the portal, as he had done in the movies before.

Anchorman Steven, Commentator Mike

Anchorman Steve has the breaking news on the Supreme Court announcing that imaginary things aren't real. Commentator Mike expounds on the impact this decision has on cases like the Cartman v. Broflovski ballsucking case.

Hippies 1, 2, 3, 4

Guard 2, Lab Techs 1, 2, 3, Tech 7

The four hippies are among a group of them protesting the imminent nuking of our imagination. The guard tries to stop Kyle from entering the Pentagon, and tells him to join the protesting hippies. The various techs shown here get involved in the discussion of what is real and what isn't, and why some things that are considered real shouldn't be, and vice versa.

Doctor, Official, Chief Justice

The doctor says Kyle is recovering, but has some trauma to the brain which might explain why he's hearing voices in his head. The official simply tells Al Gore that he does see ManBearPig onscreen. The Chief Justice announces that imaginary things are officially not real, and therefore no approval is needed to nuke them.

The Press Corps

Reporters 1, 2, 3, 4, and 5

The reporters ask questions concerning the nuking of our imagination. The fourth reporter asks if Kurt Russell could be sent through the portal to reason with the terrorists, but the general tells him that was already tried and failed..

The Imaginary Characters

Citizens of Imaginationland

Cheetara, Cinderella, Draco, Fanciful Mayor, Leprechaun

Lollipop King, Mr. Tumnus, Rockety Rocket and Terrorists, Suitcase

Pat the Hammer, Perseus, Strawberry Shortcake, Snarf

Robin Hood, Icarus, Tron Soldier

All these characters had lines in the episode, but the only ones to have any impact on the plot are the Leprechaun, the Fanciful Mayor. Draco, and Rockety Rocket. The Leprechaun warns of an impending terrorist attack, which sounds odd coming from an imaginary character. The boys catch him, but he gets away by using rainbow teleports. The fanciful Mayor hears the boys talking about the leprechaun later on and intrudes to ask if the boys had seen it. The boys have doubts about the Mayor, so he asks them to join him on a journey. Butters is afraid the Mayor is going to rape the boys, but the Mayor looks back at him, confused. The boys climb into the Imagination Flying Machine and float a long distance before arriving at Imaginationland. When the terrorists show up and destroy Imaginationland, Draco swoops down and takes the boys back home, except for Butters, who becomes the terrorists' one real hostage. Rockety Rocket is taken and armed with bombs, then pointed towards the Barrier, a great wall separating Imaginationland from its own dark side.
Snarf joins the Lollipop King and Butters on the way to Castle Sunshine, but Butters finds him annoying soon. Strawberry Shortcake (here wearing cherries for parody purposes) has been kidnapped by the evil characters, and they plan to do really bad things to her. The Headless Horseman and Frankenstein's Monster kick her, an Imperial Stormtrooper smacks her around with his rifle, and Jason gouges her left eye out. Perseus stands guard at Castle Sunshine with Robin Hood and gives orders to other guards who are dressed in Tron outfits.
Robin Hood comes to the Council to announce that troops are being shot down by the Cavity Creeps. Icarus flies in to say the good guys are losing the battle. The Tron soldier is excited by his first kill, but Beary Bear kills him with laser blasts from his eyes.

The Council of Nine

Aslan, Gandalf, Glinda, Luke Skywalker

Morpheus, Popeye, Wonder Woman, Zeus

Jesus is not pictured, as he's appeared before. Aslan has appeared before, but he's much more regal here.
They ponder Butters' presence in Imaginationland and conclude that he's the key to its survival. Gandalf tells Butters that he, Butters, is a creator, and so can imagine things into existence in Imaginationland. Butters then tries this and fails a few times before he masters this power, which comes in very handy at the very end. Wonder Woman urges Butters to imagine Santa back into existence, which he finally does. She wonders what could destroy the Cavity Creeps.

Evil Characters

Freddy Krueger, Headless Horseman, Jason Voorhees, ManBearPig

Orc, The Minotaur, The Creature, Cavity Creeps

All of them argue as to who the most evil of them is. Jason Voorhees scoops out Strawberry Shortcake's left eye. ManBearPig makes it out of Imaginationland for a while and kills two techs. He chokes Kyle until the portal pulls him back in. Kyle drops to the floor. The Creature from the Black Lagoon tells the Minotaur who the Woodland Critters are and where they came from. The Cavity Creeps march through the battlefield, crushing everything in their way. Butters imagines up a giant tube of Crest Gel with Tartar Control to fight them, and Robin Hood and Perseus walk him to the battlefield.
  1. An Ent
  2. A Centaur
  3. The Little Mermaid
  4. The Brown Hornet
  5. Santa Claus
  6. Anubis and Snarf
  7. Ronald McDonald, Boober Fraggle (under the CC logo)
  8. Rapunzel and a cowboy
  9. A griffin and a flying giraffe
  10. Raggedy Ann and Andy, a unicorn
  11. Mothra, Optimus Prime
  12. Krishna, Joseph Smith, Buddha, Lao Zi, Sea-Man, emperor penguins (in all sorts of colors), an acorn
  13. The Blue Meanies, Count Chocula, Uncle Remus and Brer Rabbit, a talking suitcase, a Care Bear, a Moon Bellied Sneetch (there are more of these in all sorts of colors)
  14. a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle, H.R. Pufnstuf, Twinkie the Kid, Elliott the Dragon (Pete's Dragon), Rockety Rocket
  15. Yeti (the Abominable Snowman), The Dreadful Flying Glove, Wild Thing (Where the Wild Things Are), Totoro, Copper Kid (Silverhawks), My Little Pony, The Little Toaster (with toast), Gizmo, Mario
  16. Jack Skellington, Little Red Riding Hood, Aubrey (Little Gems), Astroboy, Mr. Toad, Strawberry Shortcake, The Mad Hatter, The Prince (Katamari Damacy)
  17. Casper the Friendly Ghost, Mr. Tumnus, Orko; Grimace, Hamburger, Fry Kid (all McDonaldland characters)
  18. Najix (as the ice-cream-pooping taco), The Scarecrow, Peter Rabbit (like Brer Rabbit, but lighter pants), an Underpants Gnome, Humpty Dumpty, The Flash, Pat the Hammer, Dick Tracy, Mr. Clean, Voltron, Remy the Rat, Franklin the Turtle
  19. A smurf, and Dr. Seuss characters
  20. Bullet Man, Jem (now with gray hair), Punchy (Hawaiian Punch mascot), Pac-Man (toothy, hiding behind Punchy)
  21. Cinderella, Link (Legend of Zelda series), Mighty Mouse
  22. Charlie Brown, Jonny Quest
  23. a Xenomorph (from Alien)
  24. a Predator
  25. Christine the car (look in the background), Audrey II, Tribbles (from Star Trek)
  26. A Yautja (from Predator), a Tripod (from The Matrix)
  27. Robin Hood
  28. Mordred from Excalibur
  29. Tron Soldiers
  30. Fu Manchu, Khan Noonien Singh, Sagat
  31. A T-800 (Frankenstein's Monster is blocking its body), Frankenstein's Monster, Freddy Krueger, Darth Maul, a Golden Goro, Medusa, The Green Goblin, Wario, an Imperial Stormtrooper
  32. The Joker, Cerberus, a Skeksis, a Cyclops
  33. Akuma
  34. Pinhead
  35. Crest Gel with Tartar Control
  36. Pinhead
  37. Blueberry Muffin (one of Strawberry Shortcake's friends), Mickey Mouse (with his back to the camera)
  38. Steve Austin (The Six Milliion Dollar Man)
  39. Waldo
  40. ??? (lower left)
  41. ??? (Mog?)
  42. An archangel, ??? (who is that bee?)
  43. The Ghosts (Pac-Man)
  44. Sinistar
  45. Dangermouse, Snowy Milou (Tintin), the Marlboro Man
  46. Charlie Brown smiling
  47. Nibblet, Lucy van Pelt
  48. There might be a few people here I don't recognize
  49. Captain Planet, Q*Bert, the Pillsbury Doughboy
  50. Silver Surfer, Bullwinkle J. Moose, ??? (someone in a green rabbit suit), Baba Louie (Quick Draw McGraw), Frankenberry
  51. Obelix, Jonny Quest, Quick Draw McGraw, Paul Bunyan (behind the Lollipop King)
  52. Pac-Man, Rocket J. Squirrel, Boo Berry, the Lone Ranger, Tarzan, Pegasus, Quick Draw McGraw
  53. Wario, Ganondorf, Darkseid (Superman villain), Bowser (lizard between Ganondorf and Darkseid), Mumm-Ra (with horns instead of snakes)
  54. She-Ra
  55. A Cabbage Patch Boy
  56. The Big Bad Wofl?
  57. ??? (the grey orb), the Incredible Hulk
  58. Marvin the Martian
  59. Wile E. Coyote, Cobra Commander, Venom
  60. There might be a few people here I don't recognize
  61. There might be a few people here I don't recognize
  62. Cabbage Patch Kids, Nibblet, Yoda, There might be a few other people here I don't recognize.

The Master List of Imaginary Characaters as listed in Wikipedia's three articles on Imaginationland
November 10, 2007
The list now excludes the characters shown above. Are any of them up there and I just don't have them listed?

  1. a Blue Spook
  2. A Chocobo
  3. a flying monkey
  4. A monster from Where the Wild Things Are
  5. a Sentinel
  6. A Snowth
  7. Appa
  8. Ash Ketchum
  9. Bigfoot
  10. Bob Marley
  11. Bogey Orangutan
  12. Bugs Bunny
  13. Cap'n Crunch
  14. Captain Carrot
  15. Chuck Norris
  16. Cthulhu
  17. Cylons
  18. Duke (G.I. Joe)
  19. E.T.
  20. Eddie the Head
  21. Eddie the mascot for Iron Maiden
  22. Freeza
  23. Ganesha
  24. Garuda
  25. General Otmin
  26. God
  27. Goku
  28. Gossamer
  29. Grimace
  30. Harry Potter
  31. Hercules
  32. Hobbes
  33. Holly Hobbie
  34. Ichigo Kurosaki
  35. Inspector Gadget
  36. Captain James T. Kirk
  37. Jiang Shi
  38. Jinx
  39. John Coffey from The Green Mile
  40. John Henry
  41. King Ghidorah
  42. King Leonidas from 300
  43. Kraken from Clash of the Titans
  44. Lance Bean
  45. Leonard "Lenny" Kosnowski
  46. Meg Mucklebones
  47. Moses
  48. Mr. Men
  49. Ookla the Mok
  50. Oscar the Grouch
  51. Pan
  52. Peter Griffin from Family Guy
  53. Pooka from Dig Dug
  54. R.J. The Cigarette Man from Futurama
  55. Ra
  56. Reverend Henry Kane
  57. Rom (Star Trek)
  58. ROM, Spaceknight
  59. Scooter
  60. Shippo
  61. Shrek
  62. Skeletor
  63. Smoo
  64. Snoopy
  65. Snuggle Bear
  66. Spawn
  67. Spider-Man
  68. Steve Irwin
  69. Superman
  70. Tailed beasts
  71. Taz
  72. The Queen Spider
  73. Thun the Lion Man From The New Adventures of Flash Gordon
  74. Tintin
  75. Tooekneee
  76. True Ogre
  77. Tyrannosaurus-rex Dino-Riders
  78. Uncle Tom
  79. V.I.N.C.ENT
  80. Violator
  81. Wembley from Fraggle Rock
  82. Wicked Witch of the West
  83. Zorro
  84. Zylyn from Space Rangers (TV series)