Aborted Projects

Fuzzies

The February 17, 1998 edition of Spin Magazine had this about Fuzzies in the article "The Creators CANNIBALISM, PORNOGRAPHY, MENTAL DISABLIITIES, ET CETERA."
Parker's completed script for a live-action project titled Fuzzies recently drew the attention of producer Scott Rudin. The story revolves around a nine-year-old with a mental disability (he continuously repeats the phrase "bacon and cheese and carrots and peas") who triumphs over the forces of evil (large "blue-horned fuzzies") threatening to wreck his hometown. In the film's climactic scene, a brigade of mentally disabled kids charges over a hill to save the imperiled town from the clutches of the fuzzies. Like previous projects, this one appears to be bizarre and slightly reckless. But Fuzzies -- and its estimated budget of $20 million -- has been shelved at Parker's behest. "The only way I could do it is if I left South Park" says Parker. "They wanted to do it in January. I said no. They freaked out. They're like, `How can you not want to do a Paramount movie?'"
Well, Trey and Matt did make a Paramount movie, in association with Warner Brothers: South Park, Bigger, Longer, and Uncut. And though Fuzzies was shelved at Trey's request, it seems to have been dear to him, for the concept of a mentally disabled protagonist resurfaced with the introduction of Timmy in Season 4 of South Park. Timmy is a mentally challenged 8-year-old boy in a wheelchair, and his roots go all the way back to Fuzzies by way of a Daily Show-type pilot, "How's Your News?" Information on "How's Your News?" can be found in Episode 402 secrets. But that project was shelved as well.
May 15, 2001 — "How's Your News?" is coming Spring of next year! Check it out!
January 16, 2004 — Here's a sneak peek page of two character maquettes for Fuzzies: Check it out! I don't know who made that page. It wasn't me. And that page is a bit over two years old. Nothing current there.

Dumb and Dumber 2: The Early Years

Trey and Matt signed up for several projects in 1996-1997, while they waited to hear from Comedy Central about South Park. One of these was writing a script for a prequel to Dumb and Dumber. The original was a story about two friends, Lloyd Christmas and Harry Dunne, one of who is dumber than the other. The prequel was to show these two men as 16-year-olds. Herein the timeline to another shelved project.
January 18, 1998, Coming Attractions — Word has it that the South Park creators were handed $1.5 million to ink this tale of the Dumb Boys at the tender age of 16. The deal was announced well over a year ago and not much hard news has been reported about Stone and Parker's writing efforts. Has a script been turned in to New Line yet?
February 3, 1998, Variety — Dumb & Dumber 2? "South Park" creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone have signed on with New Line to script the prequel to "Dumb & Dumber." The deal will pay a guaranteed $1.5 million upfront, with salary bumps if the film gets made and becomes a box office hit. The original was written and directed by Peter and Bob Farrelly, who might still do a sequel with the original cast. That could take years, and New Line decided to quickly go a prequel route that will focus on the simple-minded brothers at the age of 16.
July 9, 1999, Entertainment Weekly — Matt Stone says, "We're doing the Dumb & Dumber script next. It's a prequel to the Farrelly brothers movie. We also want to do an album. It's all about the band, really. Also, a vacation. It's hard to have a life when you're committed to doing 73 episodes of a TV show."
The June 2000 edition of Playboy has an in-depth interview with Trey and Matt. Here's an excerpt concerning the prequel:

PLAYBOY:Are you still writing the script for a prequel to Dumb and Dumber?
PARKER:We'd rather keep it quiet, but we gave the money back. It was another thing we took at the beginning of South Park. And they were really patient with us, but when the South Park movie happened, I felt like, for the first time, I could define what a Trey Parker-Matt Stone thing was. I could say, "Here's what we're about." And we felt that doing Dumb and Dumber was a big step—not necessarily backward, but in a different direction, after we had worked so hard to define our style.
STONE:We felt like we just weren't 100 percent into it, and that we were going to dick over [New Line chief] Mike De Luca, who we respect and adore in every way, or the Farrelly brothers, or Jim Carrey. If we weren't going to go into this a hundred percent, then we're just gonna disrespect the last movie and make this piece of shit.
PARKER:And people were whispering in our ears, "Hey, people do this all the time. Get another writer, pay him, and you guys still get your fucking $2 million." But fuck that. We just wrote them big fat checks and give them all the money back. And this is the best decision I ever made.
STONE:Our agents get on us and say, "People gat paid in this town for doing nothing all the time." And we're like, "Yeah, but we don't." If someone pays me, I want to do something to earn the money.

And that's the end of that project.
June 2003 - Or so it seems. The project went on without them, but as it looks crap, don't bother looking at it.

Macromedia Shorts

On December 8, 1999 Daily Variety reported that Trey and Matt were going to make 39 shorts of lengths between 2 and 5 munutes. The shorts were to introduce characters and storylines for the fans and determine from fan reaction which ones make it to the series and/or any future movies, as well as to other forms of entertainment (games, puzzles, etc.). In January 2000, in Entertainment Weekly, Trey and Matt said that the shorts will not be related to South Park after all. They were going to try new stuff, weird stuff. They were to have full artistic control, which meant no restrictions from Macromedia or the FCC. In February Alta Vista: Live! reports that Stone and Parker, who were set to debut their show in March, now seem to be at least a month behind schedule. The duo are looking for real estate near Marina del Rey, Calif., to house some computers and serve as headquarters for the show. Explains Stone, "We're in a ramp-up period." On March 22 and 23 there was concern about the content in the first short Trey and Matt sent to Shockwave, but Macromedia said it didn't mind the content. The concern is over the audience the shorts will be presented to. It said the shorts will be for adults only, and will not be edited. Since then, nothing more has been heard of those shorts, though Macromedia has established several regions to visit on its site.
January 9, 2004 - On this day Mr. Hankey linked to an article from TV Barn that sheds more light on this abortion:
The result was "Princess." Drawn in the style of a pre-school children's cartoon, "Princess" is about a lap dog who observes the adult-sometime very "adult"-world around her. The sexual content was so extreme that production on the "webisodes" was halted early on and has never been seen in any medium.
Shocked includes clips from the two completed shorts, as well as original interviews with Stone, Parker, and the Shockwave executives who were there.
If you were hoping to see the two shorts in their entirety, forget it. Clips from the two completed shorts will be included in Shocked, TRIO's 30-minute original documentary (a parable of the dot.com age), as well as original interviews with Stone, Parker, and the Shockwave executives who were there. The documentary is produced for TRIO by World's End Television. Gregor Cameron is the Executive Producer. Shocked premieres on Sunday, March 7 at 9:00-9:30 p.m., ET/PT.

The Development and Demise of
George W. Bush and the Secret of the Glass Tiger

gleaned from Salon, South Park Studios, MyBush.org, Yahoo!, (Corona's Coming Attractions)

  1. May 1, 2000 - Trey Parker and Matt Stone announce that they will stay on at Comedy Central. The agreement, which takes effect in September, includes at least 30 South Park episodes, which will take the show through August 2003; a new live-action series quite different from South Park which they'll produce, syndication for the show (with the creators and the station sharing the profits), and other projects.
  2. November 8, 2000 - Salon has an interview with Trey and Matt about the new series they're creating for Comedy Central about the new President of the United States, whoever that will be after the votes are in. Trey and Matt have been working on ideas for the show for a couple of months now.
  3. November 10, 2000 - Gist has info on the show saying it will begin in February and will air ten episodes.
  4. January 17, 2001 - On Gist.com Trey and Matt give out some info on their new show. The title has been changed from Family First to That's My Bush and is set to première on March 14, a move back from February. A rough draft of the first script had Matt and Trey portraying Bush's daughter as incestuous lesbians, but after running the idea by Comedy Central, the boys decided to drop that angle. Trey and Matt will instead try to make everyone fall in love with Bush. The show will lampoon the sitcom genre.
  5. January 25, 2001 - Complaints from the White House and a few conservative Web sites ensure that the girls would not be fair game.
  6. February 13, 2001 - Actor Timothy Bottoms, 49, is announced as the actor to play George Bush in That's My Bush. The première is pushed back to April 4.
  7. March 15, 2001 - That's My Bush featured in Time Magazine!!! Quite a lengthy article, too.
  8. March 16, 2001 - A Brilliant Man Deserves a Brilliant Sitcom! That's My Bush! now has a Web site at Comedy Central. The Flash intro is great!
  9. March 28, 2001 - The That's My Bush Cast So Far.
    George W. Bush —
    Larry O'Shea —
    Laura Bush —
    Karl Rove —
    Princess Stevenson —
    Maggie Hawley —
    Timothy Bottoms
    John D'Aquino
    Carrie Quinn Dolin
    Kurt Fuller
    Kristen Miller
    Marcia Wallace
    Gist comes out with more information about the show, including the promise that Trey and Matt will "make everyone love George Bush".
  10. April 3, 2001 - Matt and Trey appear on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno to talk about That's My Bush..
  11. April 4, 2001 - Trey and Matt's live-action show, That's My Bush (formerly Family First), about President-elect George W. Bush, premières right after South Park. Eight episodes have been orderd so far. Trey and Matt were on KROQ, Los Angeles, being interviewed about That's My Bush. The last show airs on May 23.
  12. July 4, 2001 - TMB is featured in SP form in "Super Best Friends." Maybe Trey and Matt already knew the show was going to be canceled.
  13. August 2, 2001 - That's My Bush is headed for the Big Screen after being canceled by Comedy Central. Proposed title: George W. Bush and the Secret of the Glass Tiger. Bush will go from dweeb President to a superhero battling the Chinese, in a John Woo-style film. Work will begin on this during hiatus, with the script being pitched to Paramount and Dreamworks next week. But if Trey and Matt already have a script ready to pitch, they already knew for some time that the show had been canceled. Looks like a summer film to me, maybe for 2003. Does everyone love George Bush yet? No, but maybe when he's on the big screen they will.
  14. August 3, 2001 - Comedy Central Votes "Bush" Out, a recap of the show's run.
  15. November 9, 2001 - Zigman reports that after chatting with Breayle, he learns that there may not be a That's My Bush movie after all. Seeing as how the movie is not yet listed in Coming Attractions, this may well be the case. This may have to do with the events of September 11, as such events tend to insulate the leaders who need to deal with them in our name.
  16. October 25, 2006 - That's My Bush! finally makes it to DVD. In the commentary for the second episode, "A Poorly Executed Plan," Matt and Trey reveal the truth behind the lesbian bit: a writer wrote up a fake scene (not the rough draft mentioned above) just for auditions for the Bush twins. Matt and Trey didn't read this scene, and lesbian Bush twins were not in their plans for the show, but someone took the scene home and leaked it to the Internet. Reaction was swift, and Matt and Trey could not use the twins in any role. They then combined the twins into the secretary Princess.

My All-American and Giant Monsters Attack Japan!

Killed by Team America: World Police. The amount of effort put into making TA:WP turned them off to movie-making for a long while.