South Park Biographies

The
Families

With new families being added in the sixth season, I'd like to know the first names for Kenny's mom's (which will never be known, I'm afraid), Tweek's mom's, Bebe's parents', Wendy's parents'.

The Marshes

Randy and Sharon
Randy's DOB: March 1
Sharon's DOB: December 16

Randy is Stan's father and South Patk geologist. He saves town from volcanic eruption. Carol is Stan's mother. They both went to New York with Sheila Broflovski to protest against Terrance and Phillip. He has been beat up on the shins by Beputy Eric Cartman and has had to deal with Stan trying to remove a dead fetus from his head with an ice pick (there was no dead fetus). Carol is a housewife, but her name has been changed to Sharon. Both participated in looking for Stan and the other kids when the school bus was missing. They came down with cold sores after Stan got even with them for sending him, Kyle, and Cartman to Kenny's house in order to get chicken pox. Randy and Sharon divorced over a missing wedding ring, and Roy came into Stan's life, for a while. He fixed it so his parents would get back together and Roy would dangle from a tree by his foot. They follow Stan to Nebraska when they find that he has run away. They know where he went, so they called Cartman's mom to make sure, and then they went to get Stan back. They will punish him after the holidays. Sharon throws Stan into the Getting Gay With Kids bus even though Stan does not want to be part of a choir. She tells him he should be glad to see the rainforest, and that she wants to spend more time with Randy. Randy is hired to find out why everyone is spontaneously combusting, and gets a Nobel prize for it. Then people stone him for not taking global warming into account, but he finds another solution: moderation. People love him again. During the meteor shower party Sharon experiments with hard liquor. Randy experiments with masturbation in front of Gerald, but quickly has regrets about it. He spends the rest of the night avoiding Gerald so he won't have to talk about it, but ends up speaking loud enough for all to hear. He then confesses his action and is relieved that he's not the only one to have masturbated in front of another man. When Sharon sees how deep Stan is into Chinpokomon, she's confused as to why. When she sees him marching through town with Mr. Ose, she tries to stop him and get him to come back home. When that doesn't work, she leads the adults in embracing Chinpokomon. When the kids see this, they quickly drop the fad. Randy participates in duct-taping Mr. Cotswolds to the flagpole during the Bay Of Pigs Memorial dance, but first breaks up a fight between Mark and Kyle.

Randy and Sharon are the names of Trey's parents, and Shelley that of his sister. Randy is a government geologist, and Sharon is an insurance broker.

Shelley
DOB: November 24

Shelley is Stan's 12-year old sister, who wears braces and headgear to straighten her teeth. She's merciless towards Stan, as she can pick him up and throw him around like a rag doll. She defeated Big Stan with a head butt, busted the TV on Stan, and smothered him with a lawnmower (hopefully a toy one). She would have used matches on hin, too, but that scene was cut out for fear of imitation. She was sick from chicken pox, and got even with Stan for teasing her about it: when Stan got sick from the chicken pox and was looking at Terrance and Phillip in the same room Shelley was in, she folded him into his bed and took the remote control away. She got a television/CD player/surround sound home theater from Aunt Flo. She was hired to babysit Cartman during a night of meteor showers. She called her boyfriend Skyler over, and he in turn called his bandmates over. She sang a song called "Turds," which annoyed the bandmates, and Skyler sent them away. She wouldn't put out for Skyler, so he dumped her and went away. Cartman would have told his mom on Shelley, but saw that her pain went beyond anything he could do to her, so he decided to help her get even with Skyler. She trashed Skyler's guitar and left it in a box of kitty litter with wood shards spelling "KING TURD." Shelley and Cartman became friends.

Jimbo and Ned
Jimbo's Catch Phrase: It's coming right for us!
Ned's Catch Phrase: Mmmmm-

He is Stan's war vet uncle who likes to go hunting drunk with automatic weapons, and explosives. He is perfectly capable of devastating a deer with a bazooka, booby-trapping opponents' school mascots, and gambling on just about anything. Now has a show called, Huntin' and Killin'. Ned is Uncle Jimbo's old war buddy who goes hunting with Jimbo and the children. He has throat cancer (due to heavy smoking) so he talks through a machine called a cancer kazoo, er Electrolarynx. He has a prosthetic right arm which he has used on Cartman. He is Jimbo's side kick on the show. Jimbo and Ned have been to Mexico for some bottle rockets and were held in a Texas prison for bringing explosives into the country, but a giant ash snake freed them. Jimbo presides over the Running of the Cows during Cwo Days, and asks who stole the Cow Memorial. He has a visiting couple arrested and sent to jail. He is told of a cow cult, and tries with Ned to disband it. When that fails, he brings in the FBI, but the cows simply committed suicide. He tells the Mayor of the unfortunate details and perks up when he sees someone has declared Shenanigans on the visiting carnies. When they take the carnies to jail, he finds that the couple is dead and rotting. Jimbo has masturbated in front of a burly man named Cameron. Ned, too, has masturbated in front of men. Jimbo bets on Kyle to win the spelling bee, but flies off the handle when Kyle loses to Mark and Rebecca. He leads the adults in tying Mr. Cotswolds to the school flagpole during the Bay Of Pigs Memorial dance.

Grampa Marvin Marsh
Catch Phrase: Kill me!

He is 102 years old and tired of living. Always prods Stan or one of his friends to kill him, but it doesn't work. Since his birthday, he has won the $10,000 1st prize in Amreica's Stupidest Home Videos for filming Kenny being run over by a train. He made the opening speech for the Civil War Reenactment in which he tells how the South lost to the North, but is upset when General Cartman Lee makes off with the bell. Since the boys are now in fourth grade, he is now 103. He's still good in bed - if his partner makes it through the night.

He has since spent some time in a nursing home, but is apparently back with the Marshes at home.

The Broflovskis

Sheila and Gerald
Sheila's Catch Phrase: Whatwhatwhaaat?!
Gerald's DOB: October 4
Sheila's DOB: June 17

Kyle's Jewish mom, and an activist. Cartman considers her a superbitch, since she always does something that ruins his fun somehow. She called up all the other moms and Mr. Garrison warning them about Terrance and Phillip. She then led the adults of South Park to New York to boycott Cartoon Central until the show was replaced. She also campaigned against any Christian references in the Christmas play, and she got Barbra Streisand's autograph when Barbra had turned into Mecha-Streisand. Recently went through the pain of losing a child, only to find that Ike didn't die, but was in Nebraska. She also marshaled the town to honor Nurse Golem for her heroic efforts in spite of her deformity. Gerald is Kyle's dad, and he wasn't too pleased to see the restroom splattered with poo after Mr. Hankey reveals himself to Kyle. Both participated in looking for Kyle and the other kids when the school bus was missing. They came down with cold sores after Kyle got even with them for sending him, Stan, and Cartman to Kenny's house in order to get chicken pox. Sheila and Gerald were present for the Running Of The Buuls during Cow Days. Sheila gave Kyle $17 so he and the boys could try and win the Terrance and Phillip dolls. She and Gerald see him off when he goes with Cartman to Cartman's Grandma's house. Sheila sees Kyle off to Central America, hoping he'll bring something back from the rainforest. She and Gerald have a hard time in bed, and are always arguing. It turns out that Gerald has trouble getting an erection. When he's at work, he hears Bob Dole on the radio asking the listener why he can't get it up. Gerald turns off the radio end sees three prostitutes enter. They want to sue Randy Marsh for giving them cancer, and undress to show Gerald just where they have it. That night, Gerald comes home erect and ready for action. During a meteor shower party he masturbates in front of Randy and spends the rest of the night trying to talk to him about it. Gerald and Sheila allow Kyle to start buying Chinpokomon products when he explains to them what would happen to him at school if he didn't. When Mr. Cotswolds complains that Kyle begins to pursue Rebecca and won't let her go to a school dance to be with him, she rebels and ends up looking like a slut, and then acting like one. Kyle serenades and meets her at the dance, but he fights with her brother Mark over her honor.

The names of Stone's parents are Gerald and Sheila. Gerald is a semiretired economics professor, and mom Sheila is a homemaker

Ike
Catch Phrase: Don't kick the baby!
DOB: December 17

Ike is Kyle's little brother. He has been abducted, but returned with no harm done. He has also found the two triangles Kyle threw out and became Mega Ike, and has been circumcised (though he is Canadian, like Terrance and Phillip). Has been confused with a trashcan and used as a table post. Became a Jew Squirt during the mereor shower and leads the rest of the Squirts in freeing the elders and the Jew Scouts, thanks to Kenny. Ike is now a 3-year-old kindergartner. His original name is Peter Gints. His parents came to get him after a new Canadian law mandated the return of adopted kids to their birth parents. Kyle and the boys trekked to Canada to get Ike back. The boys find the Prime Minister, and Scott and the Gintses arrive shortly thereafter. When the Prime Minister is proved to be a fraud, his laws are rendered null and void, and Kyle gets a chance to take Ike back home. The Gintses are impressed with Kyle's dedication to Ike and hand Ike back to him. The boys go back home.

The Cartmans

Liane Cartman

Always ready to feed Cartman. Helps Cartman reinforce the idea that he's big boned. She is a promiscuous woman, sleeping with Chief Running Water, Chef, Mr. Garrison, the Denver Broncos, Congressman O'Reilly, the Governor, and the President. After all that, she turns out to be a hermaphrodite, so she is Cartman's father. Now, who is his real mother? She participated in looking for him and the other kids when the school bus was missing, and came down with cold sores after he got even with her for sending him, Stan, and Kyle to Kenny's house in order to get chicken pox. When he tried out for the Cheesy Poofs commercial and won, he and Liane went to shoot the commercial, and all the while she reminded him not to pick his nose. She stopped by to see how his clubhouse was coming along, and called him down from it for the night. She drives the boys to Cartman's Grandma's house. When Eric is up on the cross, she asks Stan and Kyle if they have seen him. They tell her they're taking care of him. She leaves with a fart. She leaves Shelley in charge of Cartman while she goes to Mr. Mackey's meteor shower party. She comes home nice and drunk and passes out on the sofa. She takes Cartman to the toy store when he learns Chinpokomon are available to buy.

In the unaired pilot, Eric had not only a mother and a pet kitten, but a father and sister as well. Liane's habit of baking all kinds of things to quiet her son is based on Trey's mom's habit of doing the same thing. Liane Cartman's first name comes from Liane Adamo, Trey's former fiancée.

(Mr.) Kitty
Quote: Mreowr
Voice: Jay Leno.

Wants whatever Cartman is eating, be it a chocolate chicken pot pie, corned beef cabbage, or beefy roast. Got singed by Cartman's anal probe when it persisted in meowing for his chicken pot pie and pissed him off. In the third season, Cartman calls him Mr. Kitty. Mr. Kitty turns out to be female, and in heat she goes looking for some action. She finds it and brings a lot of other cats home. An orgy ensues, with cats snorting catnip and drinking, passing out and having sex.

And here are his dolls:


Clyde Frog, Peter Panda, Polly Prissy Pants

Rumpertumskin and Precious

Cartman used three of these dolls when he was playing "Wild Wild West." Polly Prissy Pants became Salma Hayek, Rumpertumskin became Arliss Rumpertumskin, and Clyde Frog became Artemus Clyde Frog. And Cartman himself was James West. In fourth grade, Cartman presents a new doll: Precious, the white rubber poodle.

The McCormicks

Stuart and wife

They don't appear much, but in one episode they are the source of a domestic disturbance call that Cartman answered. The McCormicks are white trash. Mr. McCormick is a lush who can't hold a job, Mrs. McCormick is a woman who's not afraid to kick her husband's ass, and Kenny's older brother Kevin is as soiled as the kid who sits in the front row of the class. His parents participated in looking for him and the other kids when the school bus was missing. They live on the other side of the tracks. They see Kenny off and Stuart suggests he get as much food as he can while he's in Nebraska with Cartman and bring it all home. After Kenny combusts, they attend the funeral performed for him. Stuart reads Gazongas during the service. He participates in duct-taping Mr. Cotswolds to the school flagpole during the Bay Of Pigs Memorial dance.

Kevin
Quote: Mom hit Dad again. Huhuhuhuhuh

He was at the family table when the family got together to give thanks for their greenies, the one can of food Kenny got for them before the Thanksgiving turkeys came and overran the town, killing Kenny in the process. He could be Shelley's age. When the boys spent the night at Kenny's house Kevin claimed the first frozen waffle to be toasted for dinner, and was very excited when it popped out, ready to eat.

After Kenny dies in "Kenny Dies" this family disappears. They return when, one year later, it is learned that Kenny held a winning ticket to a candy shopping spree the boys had won. The boys visit the family, who had burned Kenny into ashes, and the boys assumed the ticket burned up with Kenny. They are horrified to learn that Cartman had made a milk drink out of the ashes and drunk it, thus robbing the family of their one last physical connection to Kenny. They return for Christmas, foreshadowing their son's return, which happens at the end of the episode.

Karen

An obscure fact is that Kenny once had a younger sister. She looked like Ike. Comedy Central once posted a picture of Kenny and his younger sister, but took it down because Matt and Trey never used the character. They did change the character into Ike and made him Kyle's little brother. This must have happened when the unaired pilot was made, as Ike is in the pilot and the first show of the series while the little girl is not. Since then, Kenny got a new little sister. She was mentioned (but not by name) in the original transcript for "Starvin' Marvin" but didn't appear in the episode. She appears behind Kevin in "Best Friends Forever" and finally comes to the forefront and gets her name in "The Poor Kid." Kenny cares deeply for his sister, as he comes to rescue her a few times as Mysterion. Karen doesn't know Mysterion's real identity.

The Stotches

Stephen and Linda Stotch

Butter's mom's name was Carol, but it was changed to Linda, and his father is now knows as Stephen (used to be Chris). They are the Stotches. They were first seen coming home with the other adults in "The Wacky Molestation Adventure" and again in "A Very Crappy Christmas." His mom is the first persn David Blaine tries a magic trick on in "Super Best Friends." His parents are part of the book-of-the-month club that meets at the Marsh house. When Butters is featured in his own episode, his father turns out to be a closet homosexual, and so a bisexual man. His mother, upon learning this, has a nervous breakdown and tries to protect Butters from a breakdown by trying to drown him in the family car. He survives, though, and makes his way home. His parents realize their mistakes, and in doing so reveal their true intentions, to Butters' chagrin. In the sixth season they got much more involved, more than Kenny's parents ever did, in the lives of Butters and of Stan, Kyle, and Cartman. They mark the shift in focus to more adult-oriented episodes. They hire an actor to play a future Butters who had gone down the road of drug excess, but somehow realize their error after seeing their living room covered in poo. They still find ways to ground Butters, which they take pride in.

The Tweeks

Richard and Mrs. Tweek

Tweek's dad, Richard, owns a coffee shop and has relatives who prepare the coffee he sells. His style is small-town and low-kay. He like to tease him about being sold into slavery. He tries to fight off his competitor, Harbuck's, by subtly enlisting the kids to turn the town against Harbucks by way of oral presentation about big businesses. After a taste test, the adults of South Park prefer Harbucks. Mr. Postem, of Harbucks, offers him a chance to run the Harbucks store in South Park. He declines. When Tweek comes to him about how to deal with a rival, Richard tells him a story of how he faced a rival to win his girl's affections, but doesn't finish the story. Tweek bangs his head against the table in frustration. When Mark, the home-schooled kid, comes to South Park Elementary, Mr. Tweek plays a part in duct-taping Mr. Cotswolds to the school flagpole during the Bay Of Pigs Memorial dance. Once Tweek became the fourth boy his parents make more appearances, but they still have Tweek drink coffee to calm his nerves.

The Blacks


Steve and Linda Black

His mother is a chemist for a pharmaceutical company, his father has a lucrative job of some sort, as he and his family live in an upper-class area. In "Proper Condom Use" we learn their names, including the last name Willians. His parents are part of the book-of-the-month club that meets at the Marsh house. In season 8 their last name was changed to Black, and well, Token Black.

The Tuckers


Laura, Thomas, and Sister

Craig has a very bad habit of flipping people off without any apparent reason. Now we see why: it is a normal part of communication at home. His parents are part of the book-of-the-month club that meets at the Marsh house. This is all we know of his family. They appear briefly in "Fun With Veal" to show their concern about terrorists living among the townsfolk. In Season 12 they finally got a last name: Tucker. Craig revealed this when he was sent to Peru with the boys and wrote a journal about it. Mrs. Tucker gets the name "Laura" when drones were big in town and we find out about her bush.

The Donovans


Roger and Betsy Donovan

The Donovans made their first appearance when the pedophile-priest scandal swept over the Catholic Church. The father expresses concern that his atheist son may not be able to cope in a Christian socety. That son turns out to be Clyde when the child-abduction scare swept over the nation and he has to say good-bye to his son. In the eighth season of the show, when the boys become news reporters for a while, they learn that Clyde's last name is now Donovan. Their last name was changed from Donovan to Harris when the class had to be deloused. When Clyde's mom dies in a terrible toilet accident, she's Betsy Donovan, and Mr. Donovan calls himself Roger when drones were big in town.

The Burches and Valmers


Sarah and Ryan Valmer

The Swansons finally make their appearance when Jimmy gets involved with the Crips. His father tells Jimmy that Jimmy was born as God's way of getting back at the parents for their making fun of handicapped people when they were in high school. Sarah seems more sensitive than most other mothers.
For some reason or other, in season 8 the Swansons became the Valmers. Ryan knocked on Jimmy's door and wondered if Jimmy was masturbating. Sarah came in when Jimmy was beating his girlfriend with his crutches, and he beat her off, then ran out the door.


Richard and Helen Burch

They are wheelchair-bound and mentally handicapped, like Timmy. It's not likely they work, so they live on supplemental security. But they do have a picture of the family in Paris, which means they save their money rather than spend it foolishly.

The Stevenses and Testaburgers


The Testaburgers

Mrs. Testaburger appears for the first time when Bebe begins to develop breasts and Wendy wants some breast implants to keep up.. She's not so strong a mother as to stop Wendy from getting breast implants, but she's rightly concerned that Wendy wants them at such a young age. Mr. Testaburger supports Wendy's desire to get the other girls to stop acting like sluts, but he breaks down when two teen girls begin seducing him. Then he decides that a girl wanting to be a whore is fine.


The Stevenses

Mrs. Stevens appears for the first time when Bebe begins to develop breasts. She is Bebe's mom, and she has to explain to her daughter why she's growing boobs and why that makes the boys act so weird and interested aruond her. Some of Mrs. Stevens' explanations are just nonsense, and Bebe knows it. Bebe determines not to let her boobs run her life or make the boys go ape. After Paris Hilton gets "eaten up" by Mr. Slave, Mr. Stevens tells Bebe she's going to dress like a little girl should.

The Cotswolds

The Cotswolds

Mr. and Mrs. Cotswolds enter their children in the South Park Spelling Bee, and the kids win it. The parents have done their best to teach their children at home, but fear it may all be ruined now that their kids have won the Spelling Bee. Their son Mark now wants to go to public school, and their daughter is being pursued by a little boy. Mark is allowed to go to school for a few days, but his parents are shocked when he comes home with a bench on his back. Mr. Cotswolds goes to the town bar that night and talks to the other boys' fathers. He also asks Gerald to stop his son from harassing Rebecca further. The men end up duct-taping him to a bench at the bar. A few days later Mr. and Mrs. Cotswolds learn that Rebecca is playing Doctor with Kyle, but it's not what they think. When the dance arrives, they allow their children to go, but have second thoughts and hurry to get their kids out of there. When the men see Mr. Cotswolds again, they hurry to duct-tape him to the flagpole.

The Hankeys


Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo, and Autumn

Cornwallis, Amber, and Simon
Catch Phrase: Howdy Ho!

A piece of poo that tries to let Kyle share in the Christmas spirit without him becoming a Christian, but Kyle gets committed for believing in Mr. Hankey. Chef is familiar with Mr. Hankey. After the town saw him and gathered to set Kyle free, Mr. Hankey hitched a ride with Santa. The following year, he was found to be living in the sewer under South Park, and his home there was being affected by the surge in trash brought forth by the people who attended the First Annual South Park Film Festival. A couple of times he looked like a goner, but Chef's Salty Chocolate Balls brought him back around each time. When his message was lost on the crowd he took action and drove the guests out of town with a ferocious crap storm. He has since starred in his own movie: The Grinchy-poo Who Stole Christmas. He has appeared on the front page of Rocky Mountain News.
Mr. Hankey is based on an imaginary threat. Trey's father would get Trey to flush the toilet by saying that Mr. Hankey, the poo he left, would come after him if he didn't.
After the boys enter the Fourth Grade they encounter a Christmas with very little cheer, so they, following Kyle's lead, look for Mr. Hankey where they last found him: in the sewer. Sure enough, they find him there again, only in a little house made from various containers washed into the sewer. And they find him ttere with some company: his new family. Amber is constantly drunk and she likes to party. Cornwallis is the conscientious and smart boy who looks for his place in the world. His father helps him with that in the song "Circle of Poo." Simon is the slow one, due to a peanut sticking out of his head. Amber is bright and spunky. The three poo nuggets help the boys spread some Christmas cheer, and the whole family comes up to repair the old drive-in and run the projector so the town could see a short the boys created for Christmas.